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Be In Charge Of Your Life

genecia• Genecia Luo •

While we go about our daily routine and mundane chores, most of us probably have a project we dream about, whether it is to write a bestseller, repaint your room or to start your own business. Charismatic individuals are doers, go-getters and persist to drive towards their dreams. Self-improvement is important on top of your field knowledge. As you will be soon facing a major turning point in your life, it is time to prepare for this.
One secret that I have discovered on my journey of self development, is that your success in life will be in direct proportion to what you do after you do what you are expected to do. Make an effort to rediscover and ignite your inner desires. From time to time, you have to add fire to your work and life.

To get started, I recommend Daddy’s Logic by Anthony A. Rose ­(Publisher: McGraw Hill)

Here are five ways to enhance yourself at work and in life.

1. Create your personal charisma statement.
Mine is simply “With fun and dedication, I engage, inspire, and ­excite others to look good and feel good to achieve their desired results.”  This means starting my own business as a coach to help individuals and ­business owners get what they want out of their life and business.  ­Formulating this sentence allows me to create a short charisma statement that summarises exactly what I want from life. Put that statement at the forefront of our minds when we are making important decisions.
How do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time. The same philosophy holds true for making changes in your life.  Making small, positive changes, creating some small productive habits, for example, is an amazing way to get excited about life. Keep an open mind; don’t judge. We all have our own unique paths to journey on.

2. Excel at what you do.
People watch what you do more than listen to what you say. Be ­someone worth emulating. Most people are inspired by great musicians, writers, painters, speakers, entrepreneurs, engineers, mothers, fathers, ­athletes, etc.  There is one thing they all have in common: they excel at what they do.  There is no point in doing something if you are not going to do it right. Excel at your work and excel at your hobbies.  ­Develop a ­reputation for yourself, a reputation for consistent excellence. Be ­commited towards ­personal growth.  You will be constantly changing.  How much you grow and who you become is up to you.
Acquiring knowledge doesn’t mean you are growing; growing ­happens when what you know changes how you live. You can do that by ­concentrating your efforts on smaller areas.  When your efforts are diffused over a wide area they won’t have much of an impact.  So focus on some areas and your efforts will be felt more fully.  It could take time for change to happen, but keep focusing.

3. Positivity rules.
Positive thinking is at the forefront of every great success story.  The mind must believe it can do something before it is capable of actually doing it. So be aware of your mental self-talk.  We all talk silently to ourselves. We are usually not conscious of what we are saying or how it is affecting us. Start listening to your thoughts. If you hear negative thoughts, stop for a second and replace them with positive thoughts.
The Dalai Lama once said, “The way to overcome negative thoughts and destructive emotions is to develop opposing, positive emotions that are stronger and more powerful.” Thus, be kind to yourself. The way you treat yourself will influence how others treat you.  You must love who you are or no one else will.
Give yourself permission to pause, re-organise and move forward again with clarity and purpose.  When you’re at your busiest, a brief recess can rejuvenate your mind and increase your productivity. These short breaks will help you regain your composure. Reflect on your recent actions to ensure that they are in line with your goals.

4. Solve problems not avoid them.
Part of living and growing up is experiencing unexpected troubles in life.  People lose jobs, get sick, and sometimes die in car accidents. When you are younger and things are going pretty well, this harsh reality can be hard to visualise. The smartest, and often hardest thing to do in unexpected situations is to be tempered in our reactions. You may want to scream but remember that emotional rage only makes matters worse. Tragedies are rarely as bad as they first appear to be, and even when they are, they give us an opportunity to grow stronger. Everyone you meet, everything you encounter, they are all part of the life’s learning experience. Always look for a bigger picture.  If you don’t get a job you wanted or a relationship does not work out well, it probably means that there’s something better out there.

5. Tap and leverage on your resources.
It is not about having access to unlimited resources; it is about exploiting the resources you have access to. Stevie Wonder could not see, so he exploited his voice and hearing into a passion for music, and he now has 25 Grammy Awards to prove it. What resources do you have access to that you have not been using?

Successful people are objective. They have realistic targets in mind. They know what they are looking for and why they are fighting for it.  Successful people create and pursue SMART goals.  SMART goals are Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Relevant, and Time-sensitive.  When you identify SMART goals that are truly important to you, you become motivated to figure out ways to attain them.  You will then develop the necessary attitude, abilities and skills. You can achieve almost any goal you set if you plan your steps wisely and establish a time frame that allows you to carry out these steps. Goals that once seemed far away and out of reach eventually move closer and become attainable. Not because your goals shrink but because you grow and expand to match them. Start taking action and making changes.  Action and change are often resisted when they’re needed most. Get a hold of yourself and have discipline.  Discipline is choosing what you really want over what you want right now.  Putting something off makes it instantly harder and scarier.  What we don’t start today won’t be finished by tomorrow.  And there is nothing more stressful than the lingering thought of an unfinished task.

A dream is a goal with a deadline. A dream without a deadline is just building castles in the air. You might fail. And that’s OK.  Failures are simply stepping stones to success. Either you succeed or you learn something.  It is a win-win thing. The biggest mistake you can make is doing nothing because you’re too scared to make a mistake.  If you can’t handle failure, then you can’t handle success either. Good luck!